I am a very loyal customer of AOL and I think I am addicted to the phrase “You’ve got mail“. I have been with AOL from the beginning of times-or should I say email times. As soon as I open my eyes I check my inbox, just to hear the sweet words: “You’ve got mail!” One sunny day I woke up and I swear I heard: “You’ve got way too much mail!”
In the course of all these years I’ve collected over 7000 junk emails in my inbox…… not bad, right! I know some people who’ve had over 20,000. I will not name names, you know who you are! I have decided that finally the time has come to clean my inbox , but it’s so boring, so instead of cleaning it, I played with my junk.
What’s Triggering Your Migraines? The Back Room at Loehmann’s – that’s what!
or maybe: Banks Forced to Forgive Credit Card Debt! See If You Qualify for Relief! and when I checked I wasn’t qualified – migraine!
…and then I realized it’s not that, it’s this: A Power Wheelchair at little to no cost – see if you qualify - once again I wasn’t qualified – migraine!
My migraines were not going away no matter what I tried, and then I got an answer from some nice people, who sent me this:
30 lbs. Overweight? Try Sensa(R) Free! - this for sure will cure it – right? Wrong!
You know what did it for me:
You are the Millionaire Winner We’ll Announce 5/31!
My migraine was gone in a second – I will be a millionaire soon, very, very soon!!
and I can do this: Dating News: 1 in 6 Marriages Start Online – Meet Singles Today!
Oooops , I forgot I am already happily married……
Okay , forget dating: Blowout savings on all 2011 vehicles – great! I will buy a new car! Or even better – I will go on vacation: New Hotel Deals from $45/night! and Save $500 on 2012 Trafalgar Europe Vacations.
I got so excited fantasizing what I am going to do when I am a millionaire, that my migraine decided to come back and as soon as it did, I got this offer: 13 Ways to Relieve Chronic Pain along with this one Cindy Crawford shares her Advanced Anti-Aging Secret - hmm….how does Cindy know I am getting wrinkles – I never shared this information with her.
I am making progress-I am down to 6739 emails now.