I am a very loyal customer of AOL and I think I am addicted to the phrase “You’ve got mail“. I have been with AOL from the beginning of times-or should I say email times. As soon as I open my eyes I check my inbox, just to hear the sweet words: “You’ve got mail!” One sunny day I woke up and I swear I heard: “You’ve got way too much mail!”
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In the course of all these years I’ve collected over 7000 junk emails in my inbox…… not bad, right! I know some people who’ve had over 20,000. I will not name names, you know who you are! I have decided that finally the time has come to clean my inbox , but it’s so boring, so instead of cleaning it, I played with my junk.
What’s Triggering Your Migraines? The Back Room at Loehmann’s – that’s what!
or maybe: Banks Forced to Forgive Credit Card Debt! See If You Qualify for Relief! and when I checked I wasn’t qualified – migraine!
…and then I realized it’s not that, it’s this: A Power Wheelchair at little to no cost – see if you qualify - once again I wasn’t qualified – migraine!
My migraines were not going away no matter what I tried, and then I got an answer from some nice people, who sent me this:
30 lbs. Overweight? Try Sensa(R) Free! - this for sure will cure it – right? Wrong!
You know what did it for me:
You are the Millionaire Winner We’ll Announce 5/31!
My migraine was gone in a second – I will be a millionaire soon, very, very soon!!
and I can do this: Dating News: 1 in 6 Marriages Start Online – Meet Singles Today!
Oooops , I forgot I am already happily married……
Okay , forget dating: Blowout savings on all 2011 vehicles – great! I will buy a new car! Or even better – I will go on vacation: New Hotel Deals from $45/night! and Save $500 on 2012 Trafalgar Europe Vacations.
I got so excited fantasizing what I am going to do when I am a millionaire, that my migraine decided to come back and as soon as it did, I got this offer: 13 Ways to Relieve Chronic Pain along with this one Cindy Crawford shares her Advanced Anti-Aging Secret - hmm….how does Cindy know I am getting wrinkles – I never shared this information with her.
I am making progress-I am down to 6739 emails now.
I really like my spam filter. I do have to glance at who the e-mails are from just in case a good message got sent there, but once I’ve done that, it only takes 2 clicks to delete them all. Whew! Good luck with your project and I hope your migraine gets better soon.
I clear my spam each and every day, some of it is down right nasty. I can tell you I think I know Cindy Crawford’s anti aging secret; you know the one that keeps here from getting wrinkles…. she’s young! hee hee!
OMG, this is too funny! Congrats on becoming a millionaire and I do hope you get rid of that migraine soon! lol
This is hilarious! Isn’t it crazy how much spam is out there? You’ve inspired me to check my junk mail box now.