One of the perks of having an extra day off is having an appointment with your hairdresser a day other than Saturday- this way you can totally avoid all the gossipy conversations with all the ladies in the salon – or can you? Last Friday I went to visit my wonderful hairdresser. Just for the sake of this article I will call her M. No matter what mood I am in, she can always make me feel even better and the best part about her – she works at the very small boutique and has small amount of clients, who I don’t really know, until yesterday…..
I came in 5 minutes before my time, and she only had one more lady before me; let’s call her “L.” “Perfect!” I thought – great timing, I will be in and out without any delays….I plugged in my headphones trying to concentrate on Nabokov’s “Lolita” on my ipod, but …….
I got sucked into the conversation- no, this is not entirely accurate – I “overheard” the conversation between L and M. (I should have turned my ipod on full blast).
Here you go, try to read this with a very heavy Russian accent!
L: Listen, M did you hear about Paul?
M: No, which one Paul I or II?
L: Paul II, did you hear: his wife caught him kissing Paul I .
M: Then it does not matter which Paul you are telling me about Paul I or II it’s about the two of them.
L: Don’t interrupt and just listen. His poor, poor wife comes home a little early from work and finds her beloved Paul, who is suppose to baby sit their dog, tangled up in a passionate kiss with another Paul .
M: Oh, thank G-d it wasn’t a girl. It’s so much better than he was just kissing another guy, that means there is still room for her in this marriage.
L: Are you crazy?!?! Are you listening to what you are saying? By the way I would like my bangs to be shorter this time. Can you please make them shorter?
M: You don’t look good with short bangs, let me do my job. So what is Paul’s wife going to do?
L: Which Paul, I or II?
M: I am confused I thought both Pauls were involved…..
L: Then which wife are you talking about? Don’t forget about my haircut , I want it a little fluffy this time, last time you made my head too flat.
M: You have a lot of hair, it needs to be flatten, are you going to let me do my job, or just going to boss me around? When you sit in my chair – you be quiet and let me create. Anyway tell me about Paul’s wife…
L: Which one?
M: I don’t care which one – both of them.
L: I am not sure what they going to do and to be honest with you I am not sure that this whole story makes any sense. I heard it from K and she heard it from F, who heard it from her hairdresser.
M: Oh, I know her hairdresser, I am going to call and get to the bottom of this. When you come over next time I’ll tell you all about. Now, look how beautiful you look with your new hair. “Rada, she turns to me, doesn’t she looks gorgeous?” Yes, yes she does – I reply, while making myself comfortable at the chair in front of the mirror.
Lady L paid and left and now it’s my time.
M: Did you hear about Paul and Paul.
Me: I don’t know them…..
M: Honey, I am so glad we have a lot do today, while I do your hair I will tell you a story about Paul and Paul and their wives and their dog…..
Me: I don’t know all these people and I don’t care, please don’t tell me.
….but it was too late … My darling M was ready for my hair and my ears regardless of my interest….